Transcript of Steve Smith Q&A

      Following is a partial transcript of Steve Smith’s interview with reporters Thursday, including the Observer’s Charles Chandler. It was the first time Smith has taken questions from media covering the team since he punched teammate Ken Lucas in training camp Aug. 1. That incident led to his two-game suspension, which ended this week. His answers and the questions he was asked were edited for clarity and brevity.

   

Q: How is it being back with the team?
   A: It’s a relief. It’s great to get to be back with the guys, to be back on the field.
   Q: How did you stay in shape while you were suspended?
   A: I worked out at velocity, worked out every day there, kind of just staying on the same regimen as if I was playing. Getting up, being on the field at 9:30 or 10, going for about an hour and a half. So doing that stuff.
   Q: How was it being away from the team for two weeks?
   A: It was very difficult. That’s just part of the deal. That’s what happened. That’s the consequences, so you just take it, you apply it, you try to work from it and you still go about your day.
   It could have been worse. I could not have a job. So there are a lot of things I’ve pondered in my mind that you just kind of shake yourself out of, and not really take what people might say is a victim mentality and go out and do my deal.
   Q: Did you watch the first two games?
   A: The first game, I listened to because my son had a soccer game up in Asheville, so I drove back and I was listening to the game. (It was a) long drive, so it was a nice game to listen to. The second game, I watched it until halftime and then my son had another soccer game. I listened to it until about the third quarter and then I left.
  Q: How did you find out who won (the Panthers-Bears game last Sunday)?
   A: I was texting Ryan (Vermillion, the team trainer), talking to people who were able to watch the game and found out. I was getting updated.
   Q: Are you surprised the Panthers are 2-0 without you?
   A: It didn’t surprise me. I kept in contact with a number of guys. I was out and just the attitude of the guys was really positive and outstanding. They had a grudge and chip on their shoulder. I could tell the way they played. That fourth-down stand (against the Bears), I didn’t get to see it, but that just shows where this team is.
   Q: Were you surprised by your teammates’ outpourings of support for you?
   A: It was just good to hear. It didn’t surprise me because of the open dialogue that we’ve had, that we continuously have. We’ve all talked, all of us talked at different times. It’s only surprising to the people outside and guys are still going about their day.
   Q: When did you realize you would be accepted back by your teammates?
   A: I just took it as you give guys time and you don’t force the issue. Just come in and do my deal. Obviously, the way Ken (Lucas) handled it just kind of leads the way.
  Q: How have things evolved between you and Ken?
   A: I really let Ken talk about it. I don’t really feel like it’s my place. I’m really not going to try to spin it or put my take on it. I’m going to play. I’m going to communicate and talk. I’m not going to try to paint a picture.
  Q: But would you say you two are friends now?
   A: Yeah. I would say we’re friends. I would think we are friends. I would think the conversations we’ve had would indicate we are. I think we had a great conversation the first time we talked back in training camp for about two and a half hours. We walked into it (and) there were some frowns going on, some laughing. We talked about a lot of things. I think that was kind of the ice breaker. Hopefully, it continues, and I think it will.
   Q: Why do you think there has been some distance between the two of you in the past?
   A: I mean, flat out, I thought he didn’t like me and he thought I didn’t like him. Just plain and simple.
   Q: Once you communicated, did you find out something different about that?
   A: Yeah. I mean, I’ve always respected Ken. So I guess it was one of those, two prima donnas.
   Q: How has it felt to receive his forgiveness?
   A: It’s a relief. But it’s still something, even as I’m talking, it’s one of those things were I’m just trying to let go of the past. I really am.
   Q: How will you fit back in with the team?
   A: My initial thought, honestly, is these guys have busted their butt. They’ve played hard, and everybody is expecting and wondering where do I fit in. I don’t have to fit in. I’m part of this team. Those guys have made that (clear). I’ve heard that come out of their mouths. It’s continuously come out of their mouths.
   I don’t need to try to fit into something I’m already a part of. That’s the relief part, the stress-free part. I think that really identifies this team, that people really don’t understand.
   That’s one of the reasons why I didn’t want to talk yesterday. I just got here and was trying to feel my way through. Everybody wants me to explain and tell how I feel about coming back. I’m happy to be back, but I’ve also got a lot of catching up to do as far as in the playbook, as far as making sure I know what I’m doing, my opponent, and just getting back into the flow of things with Jake, Muhsin, Hack, D-wayne and all the guys who are in here.
   It’s a lot to bear on the first day and making sure that I make peace, or I need to let people know what’s going on. My first priority is in here and my job. Then everything else, I’ll allow that time to present itself at the appropriate time, like today.
  Q: Are you excited about getting to play again?
   A: I’m excited. (He chuckles) We’ll see on Sunday.
   Q: Do you think you’re working on a last chance with this team?
   I’m not looking at it like that. I just come here to play. Is it my last chance? I don’t really see myself as trying to put myself back in this predicament, no matter what people may speculate, or say, or bring up.
  Q: What did you learn from being away for two weeks and how has it changed  you?
   A: I can’t really say exactly what everything I’ve felt and thought. I know I’m not a victim. I’m not giving it lip service. I’m not saying stuff just to get people off my back. I’m telling you how I feel. Sometimes, obviously, when you do something wrong, you don’t want to constantly keep talking about it and going over and over.
   Whether it happened two weeks ago or a month ago, you just kind of want to say, 'I’ve made a mistake. I had to pay a price.’
   Were my actions enough for the people who have set the guidelines for it? … They felt it was. My teammates felt it was. At times, I’ve heard my teammates say it was maybe over the top. That never came out of my mouth. I’m kind of just taking it all in and working on one day. I’m just taking it one day at a time. People already have their perception of me anyway. I just kind of keep doing my deal, playing football, going to work and doing the stuff I need to do.
   As coach Fox said, it is what it is.
   If I allow my past to stay in the back of my head all the time, then I miss out on the future and I miss out on the present things that are happening. There are times I have done that. There are times I did a good job of just letting it go. That’s what I’m trying to do, just let it go.
   Q: Where you apprehensive about walking into that meeting room in Spartanburg when you had discuss the incident with your teammates?
   A: How about butterflies, let’s go with that word. Apprehensive, for me, feels like there’s an option to turn back, or you’re kind of teetering on the fence, Do I want to do it or do I not want to do it?
   Despite what people think, I ain’t got much quit in myself, so I can’t do that. I won’t do it.
  Q: Are you receiving counseling regarding dealing with anger?
   A: Not really. No. There are a ton of suggestions when incidents happen, no matter who it is or what it is who throw their nickel, quarter, dollar, dime, two cents – however you want to say it – into a situation when it’s not them. People think they have an answer on what happened and why it happened. There are a number of reasons why. Probably the reasons why, people would think I was lying. There’s no two sides and I’m not going to make an excuse.
   Q: Are you better able to handle the scrutiny and aftermath of this situation than you have been in the past?
   A: I think I can handle it. I don’t know if the people who have to write when I don’t give them what they want are able to handle it. I think so, you know. I had things to do yesterday. I had to watch film. I had to do rehab on my shoulder. I had kind of a busy, busy day. I’m still trying to work on my locker. I still don’t have my kids’ pictures up like I usually do. I’ve got a lot of work to do.
  Q: You’ve said you’re not worried about what people think of you, but are you concerned that you gave away a lot of the goodwill you built up over the past five years?
   A: I guess the question would really be would depend on how you write it, or how you say it. The things I do are because of where I’m from. I know how impactful resources of funding, of time and all those things are.
   I have never done my foundation work to vamp up an image. I do it because I know what it is to be poor.
   I remember a few Christmases I knew we couldn’t afford anything, but I got gifts. That’s why I do what I do, because I know what it is to be on the other side.